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there was this apartment listing. for a very, very, i mean suspiciously cheap in-law. but the listing said "we are more interested in finding the right person than in charging a lot of rent," or whatever, and "so tell us something about yourself when you call." and i thought that kinda makes sense. you don't want a crazy person living in the room next to you way up there in the hills. so i actually thought about this all night and all morning: what could make them want me to live there? i make good bread and i'll share! you can meet fig! i just read books all the time so i'm very quiet! i'll offer to pick things up for you when i go to the store! i love my mother and i am a very respectful neighbor!

so i called "steve and liz," or the number that claims to be steve and liz, with my list of reasons i am a spectacular choice for their studio, and it goes straight to voice mail: "hi, this is liz. i know steve very well, and he's a great guy. if you rent the apartment, please be willing to play around a little."

i *knew* something like this was up, but i thought perhaps i did not have enough faith in the world.

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